[JPL] Message from a transplanted New Yorker

Russell Haines russjazzworld at gmail.com
Sun Jan 16 11:47:38 EST 2011


COLD  IS A RELATIVE THING....



 65  above zero:
  Floridians turn on the heat.
  People in Wisconsin plant gardens.


   60  above zero:
  Californians shiver uncontrollably.
  People in Wisconsin sunbathe.


   50  above zero:
  Italian & English cars won't start.
  People in Wisconsin drive with the windows down.


   40  above zero:
  Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats. People in
Wiscomsin throw on a flannel shirt.



   35  above zero:
  New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
  People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.


   20  above Zero
  People in Miami all die.     Wisconsinites close the windows.


 Zero:
 Californians fly away to Mexico.
  People in Wisconsin get out their winter coats.


   10  below zero:
  Hollywood disintegrates.
  The Girl Scouts in Wisconsin are selling cookies door to door.

  20  below zero:
  Washington DC runs out of hot air.
  People in Wisconsin let the dogs sleep indoors.


   30  below zero:
  Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
  Wisconsinites get upset because they can't start the Snowmobile.


   40  below zero:
  ALL atomic motion stops.
 People in Wisconsin start saying saying..."Cold enough for ya?"

   50  below zero:
  Hell freezes over.
  Winconsin public schools will open 2 hours late.


I've lived here for 19 years and still dig it.

cheers,

Russ

Russ Haines
Jazz/World Music Director
WWSP 90fm
1608 Reserve Street
Stevens Point, WI. 54481


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